Total Recall

The PG-13 rating didn't prepare me for naked breasts (3 of them. [While I knew the character was in the movie, I was unaware she would be topless.]) Perhaps that was my bad, and I should have read more about it, but WHO DOES THAT? Nobody. I hate PG-13 movies with nudity, and F-bombs. I hate them. That's right, I also hate Titanic and Across the Universe.

That being said, I had a feeling the worst was behind me, (and it was,) and stayed for the entire thing; (I wanted my 14 dollars worth!) So, I sat through a LOT of strobe-light-shaky-cam, a lot of Kate Beckinsale swearing, a lot of Colin Farrell trying really hard, and a lot of Jessica Beil not being as awesome as Kate Beckinsale.

I liked that Hal (left) from Malcolm in the Middle was in it. (He's also in Seinfeld.)

I liked that the wife character was in the movie throughout the entire thing, and didn't just vanish after the first act. But altogether the Arnold version was a better movie, (but a more R rated one.)

I'm not sure why they remade this movie... well, I'm not sure why they remake any movie... apart from the whole money thing.

In short, don't bother.