Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 1

So, remember that part in New Moon, where Jacob, Bella and Mike go see that movie and Mike has to leave and go barf during it.... Well, barfing during a movie is no laughing matter since that's what I wanted to do throughout most of Breaking Dawn: Part 1, and what at least one other person actually did, (by evidence of the hallway after the show.)

Not only did producers release this film during flu season, and not only did they cut Breaking Dawn into two movies so that the disturbing blood-drinking, bone-breaking, Bella-dying disgustingness lasted throughout most of the movie and not just 20 minutes, but they also included a very cheesy scene in which the werewolves, in wolf form, spoke to each other. Now, I'm a Twilight fan and even I found that far too cheesy!

Parts of the movie were fun. I loved the speeches at the wedding, (Jessica always cracks me up,) and Charlie is awesome, as always. But for most of the movie I felt sick. Now, I felt sick going in to the movie, but the movie... just didn't help.

And while I very much appreciate the whole pro-life aspect, and Bella's choice was heroic and speaks fondly of all mothers who have chosen their baby's lives over their own, Bella spent most the movie looking like Skeletor swallowed a beach ball. It wasn't a pretty sight.

If you have children, do not take them to see this movie. It is not what the previews make it appear. And if you plan on getting pregnant in the future, or are pregnant, don't even think about watching this movie... ever.