Favorite Star Wars Character

Because I ran out of Harry Potter quandaries, and because I haven't seen a movie in WEEKS, I haven't posted a lot lately. :( Sorry.

So, let's take a break from "what I think," and find out what the heck YOU think.

There's a lot of Star Wars talk going on, (I know at my house The Old Republic has been on the brain for the last few years!) so we're gonna participate, and you are gonna tell us all who your favorite Star Wars character is and why.

Is it Chewbacca, because he's a giant dog and you find that appealing in a man?

Is it Han Solo, because of, you know, dreamyness?

Is it Luke, because you're a 2 year old boy and have yet to discover Luke's lameness?

Is it Leia, because she's a lady like you, and the only other lady who speaks is Mon Mothma and she's too serious to hang out with?

Is it C-3PO, because you think you could melt down his golden body and buy a whole lot of candy with it?

TELL US!!!!

Shrek, Shrek and More Shrek (kind of)

Puss in Boots Trailer

It's too cute! (In a good way.)

Summer Movie Season Has Ended... Thank Goodness!

Now let's get to the movies we WANT to see!

Incoming -

Ghostbusters III  (exact date unknown)
With all your old favorites and some HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE new ones like Anna Faris and Eliza Dushku!

Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Sea of Monsters (exact date unknown)

The Three Musketeers (October 21)
I know this is going to be horrible, but I'm gonna see it.

Puss in Boots (right) (November 4)

Breaking Dawn Part I (November 18)

The Muppets (November 23)

Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows (December 16)

Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance (February 17)

THE HUNGER GAMES (March 23)

The Avengers (May 4th)

And coming next Summer -

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (below) (June 22)

The Dark Knight Rises (July 20)

The Bourne Legacy (August 3)

And after next Summer -

James Bond 23 (November 9)

Breaking Dawn Part II (November 6)

The Hobbit (December 14)

Sorry, other movies, but nobody cares! (Yes, I'm including you, GI Joe II and Clash of the Titans II.)

The Ordeal of Picking a Least Favorite Pirate of the Caribbean Movie.

Ever find yourself forcing yourself to choose a favorite something? "People always ask me what type of cake is my favorite so I have to decide NOW!"

Come on, don't tell me I'm the only one who forces herself to pick favorites! Fine. I'm the only one. Well, sometimes it's easy to pick a favorite. Watch - 

Ahem. My favorite Pirate of the Caribbean movie is Curse of the Black Pearl. Tada! Easy breezy! 

BUT, it's not always so easy to pick a LEAST favorite. That, my friends, is today's purpose: to pick a least favorite Pirate of the Caribbean movie. 

(Sao Feng (Chow Yun-Fat - right/below) says, "I had a lot of media coverage, but I was hardly in this movie! Suckers!")

Now, narrowing the choices down is, at least, very simple. We know that Curse of the Black Pearl is not our least favorite, because it is our favorite. And On Stranger Tides, while dull in places, is also not our least favorite. It's just not. (Sometimes you just know.) Which leaves us with the dreaded Dead Man's Chest and At World's End. *Shudder*

Hmm... this is hard. Let's make a list of pros and cons... or maybe just cons.

Dead Man's Chest (or, Pirates of the Caribbean II.)

Cons -

Too much Davy Jones business! ACK! Grody! 

Tooooooo pretentious! From the very beginning the movie has us rolling our eyes and exclaiming, "OH come on!" Oh boo hoo! The writing is so bad, SO BAD! It makes me cry... no seriously, I wept. 

Stop talking about the rum being gone. Stop talking about the effing sea turtles. Stop talking about EVERY funny part in the first one and make a new joke. Try that!

Prons, er, Pros -

It's inventive at times. It's entertaining. It has interesting characters like the disheveled Commodore Norrington. Yet all this business between Elizabeth and Jack is just... well, dumb. Uck, let's move on.

At World's End

Cons - 

20 minute scene of Jack in "Davy Jones's Locker." Wake me when it's over! (Or let me sleep, either one.)

The movie ends and I think, "What happened during that film? I honestly can't recall." (Yes, I really do say "recall.") All the Calipso business is ridiculous, not to mention all that other business. These movies have far too much going on!

Pros -

Oh forget it.

In short, I hate both these dumb movies, but I insist on having a hierarchy! So... I'm going to pick At World's End as my least favorite. I hate the ending so much, SO MUCH!

I invite you to pick your least favorite Pirate of the Caribbean movie.

Here's the part where I apologize for not watching better movies, and for bringing Pirates of the Caribbean up so often. Also, if this post inspires you to watch the movies again, I'm very, very sorry.

(OH! And for those of you who wonder, that is Johnny Depp making those "Eh, ah, erg," noises in Lego Pirates of the Caribbean video game.)

Chick Flick vrs Fart-Eater

Has my objection to the phrase "chick flick" revealed itself in these posts? I've been known to object to it openly and whenever possible, on Yahoo, at dinner, anywhere. My biggest objection to the term is that males have never had a term to refer to "their stupid movies," before. The major theory of why this abominable happenstance occurs is mainly that these movies need a name. These are the only movies which are made for the female demographic; all other movies are made for men. So, to differentiate, we must have a name for these "women movies."

However, the social connotation is - "chick-flick" = lame, girlie, un-cool, or any other unfortunate synonym. Do you see my problem? There's nothing wrong with Pride and Prejudice (well, at least not the BBC's version.) Just because boys don't like something, doesn't make it lame or un-cool. Yet, somehow, thanks to social binaries, it does. We need a great equalizer. Fairness in all things! Right?

Now, I can't take credit for the term "fart-eater." I have to give that all to Orson Scott Card, and the use of it in this fashion I must give credit to "her P-nutty goodness." (those of you that know her, know who I mean.) "Fart-eater" is an adjective used here to describe a certain type of sense of humor required to enjoy certain movies, or a person found in possession of certain sense of humor. In short, if you're a "fart-eater" it more-or-less means that you enjoy fart jokes, crude humor, and movies like Old School. One might even refer to these types of movies as the male equivalents of the regretfully termed "chick-flicks."

Since I suppose calling men "fart-eaters" is nearly as offensive as calling women "chicks," I'm going to relax my stance and objection to the phrase, (but only somewhat.)

To quote my favorite anime - The Big-O (above) - "We have come to terms."

Something that'll brighten your February.

Have you had a bad day? :( Awww. I know; Wednesdays can be rough. But, on the bright side, I have GREAT NEWS!

Click here for a Ghost Rider sequel preview!  Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance. What a title! I can't wait!



"I'm not afraid of you."
"You should be."
... isn't that a line from Twilight?

Conan the Barbarian (2011)

Now, I haven't seen this movie, nor am I going to, but I feel that that shouldn't impede my ability to write an accurate critique about it. Observe.

"The tale of Conan the Cimmerian and his adventures across the continent of Hyboria on a quest to avenge the murder of his father and the slaughter of his village."

Whatever that synopsis was, it reminded me of a Tick quote -
"It's French."
"Sounds Made-Up to me."

Actually, it just sounds like every other movie EVER.

I picture this movie to be a LOT like 2010's Clash of the Titans, or Prince of Persia. Now, the first Conan movies were developed by a bunch of nerds who thought a movie about a big buff dude would rock, (sure, who wouldn't think that?) These movie-making peeps may have lacked brain cells, but hey, at least they had a vision. However, this new version lacks brain cells and vision. I guaran-freaking-tee you that the makers of this movie made this movie hoping fans of the old Conan would follow it into the year 2011, and therefore they wouldn't have to do such tiresome things as "develop characters or plot." Evidence of this claim is supported by the fact that the movie is shown in 3D. ALL 3D movies are not made because of a vision, but because people will eat up the garbage. (And if people eat garbage, then we don't have to fear the Wall-E-esk apocalypse!) More supporting evidence can be found in the lack of stars. We've all learned to fear movies with all-star or big-star casts, (The Tourist, I'm looking at you,) but we must also fear movies with no-star casts. The biggest star in this cast is the washed-up Rose McGowan....

This is not a film, this is an advertisement for previews. I hope those of you that went to see it at least got a Hunger Games preview.

And, those of you who saw it, lemme know what you thought... 'cause there's a chance I could be wrong.... Small chance.

Now, where's Conan the Librian? 'Cause THAT I would pay money to see.