Saturday, January 29, 2011

"I'm crying, so the movie must be good."




Why do we think tears equal greatness? Why are there no comedies up for Academy Awards? Why aren't comedians up for Oscars? Getting people to laugh is much harder than getting people to cry. It's easy to get people to cry. Easy! EASY!
Plus, crying is not a great emotion. In this day and age I need no excuse to cry. I do, however, need more reasons to laugh. Comedies are doing the world a human service. Tear jerkers are just depressing us all! Maybe crap-sap film is the reason everyone's on Prozac.



And, as you can see, our need to see celebrities crying can be filled by these simple, 
hilarious, photos.


By the way, if you use the word "crap-sap" to define a crappy-sappy movie, you owe me a dollar. ;)










Friday, January 21, 2011

The Green Hornet

Starring Seth Rogen, and Jay Chou. Seth Rogen also co-wrote this film. That should tell ya something.

Most of this film was about a cup of coffee... no, I'm being literal.

Remember watching TV show and thinking, "Kato doesn't need this Green Hornet dude." Well, the same statement flies in this movie.

A superhero posing as a villian is an intreging idea, if Batman, and the X-Men didn't beat The Green Hornet to it. The idea is hardly new, just never deliberate.

Speaking of deliberateness, I'm convinced nothing in this movie was.

Overall, I was hoping for a few laughs, or even one laugh, and recieved none. It wasn't horrible.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

No, please.

First Christopher Nolan casts Katie Holmes as Rachel in Batman Begins, and now he's cast Anne Hathaway as Catwoman.

I just hope Batman kicks her a#$.

Don't get me wrong. I don't hate Anne Hathaway. I tolerate Anne Hathaway. I love Batman.

She's a step up from Katie Holmes, but a step down from Maggie Gyllenhaal... and I'm not even a big Gyllenhaal fan. But would Katie Holmes have been cast as Rachel if she wasn't all over the tabloids? And would Anne Hathaway have this role if she wasn't huge right now? The world would be a better place if stars were cast based on talent, not popularity.

Monday, January 10, 2011

Julie and Julia

In this movie they show a clip of Dan Aykroyd playing Julia Child on Saturday Night Live. I think he does a better job at it than Meryl Streep. His "Julia Child voice" is certainly less obnoxious.

I'm a big Amy Adams fan, but I hated Julie. I wanted to slap some sense into her, and her stupid hair cut. Can you tell that I'm not a fan of this movie? I just don't get the appeal of it. Explain it to me.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Superman and Batman Apocalypse

Weird title. This movie had very little to do with any sort of apocalypse. It had more to do with Superman, Batman, Wonderwoman, (we even have a cameo from Superdog,) and some peeps that I've never heard of rescuing teen-scene Supergirl from the clutches of Darkseid.

Apparently Darkseid wants an ultra-super, ultra-obnoxious teenager to be the captain of his fury army. Which is a little amazing since the only thing she's good at is destroying stuff, bringing everyone down, and eating all our steaks.

This movie was PG13 for some reason. I think that rating is a bit ridiculous. Yes, people die. Yes, there's a little blood. Yes, each and every superhero lady's costume is either underwear, or a monstrosity so heinous I wouldn't fain to sleep in it. (See above.) But PG13? I think they're getting a little ahead of themselves. Oh! Supergirl does run around naked for a while. You don't see anything, but you know she's naked. That's probably the cause, but even then, when Disney's The Hunchback of Notre Dame didn't have clothes on fire-Esmeralda in the "Hell Fire" scene, they were only going to give the movie a PG rating, up from a G. I guess veiled nudity, plus blood, and a wee bit of violence equals something as inappropriate for children as The Dark Knight, or Austen Powers.


Overall, this movie was entertaining enough. I would say "I liked it," or "I enjoyed it."  Whilst I LOVED Batman: Mask of the Phantasm.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

30 Rock vrs The Mary Tyler Moore Show

I know it's TV, but they're the exact same show!

Both shows have shows within the show.
Now check out the cast-
Mary, from MTM, is a single woman in her 30's who works for a TV show. So is Liz.
Lou, from MTM, is a man. Lou is the boss. So is Jack.
Ted, from MTM, is a man. Ted is stupid. Ted is the star of the show within the show. So is Tracy.
Jenna, from 30 Rock, is Liz's best friend. Jenna is obnoxious. Jenna is like unto Rhoda, Mary's best friend, and Phyllis, Mary's obnoxious friend.
Murray, from MTM, is balding. Murray has a wife. Murray also works for the show and shares the same hard times his female counterpart has, just like Pete.


I think 30 Rock is aware of the similarities. What else would explain the opening credits in the pilot episode? It's very Mary Tyler Moore-esk, but the song is ironic because it's not about the Mary character, Liz, but about Jenna... in a fat suit.

Apparently Stephanie told me this a year ago. It's so true!