Monday, July 19, 2010

Grown Ups (and Americord)

It is my humble opinion that Entertainment Weekly is full of crap.

How does one give "Grown Ups" a B-. Were they watching the same plot-void movie I was?

Sorry, Americord. But a movie's gotta have a plot to get above a C on my list.

As far as plot-challenged movies go, "Grown Ups" was enjoyable and didn't make you wonder, "When on earth are they going to get to a point?"

Meanwhile, Americord made me wish I was never born. I liked Volpina, but hate
d everyone else. I hated the rawness of it, which might be what people like about it. I hated the scene on top of pointless scene. I felt that SOME fans of this movie might just like it because liking it makes them feel smart and artsy.

Maybe I feel I have nothing to prove. Maybe that's why I hate this movie. It's also hard for me to appreciate something so foul and crass.

Netflix "Grown Ups." And only watch "Americord" if you want to punish yourself.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Valentine's Day


If someone jumped off a bridge after watching this movie. I would have to say, "Yeah. That's about right."

They MUST have taken Love Actually and VERY slightly, changed it to fit Valentine's Day instead of Christmas.

SIMILARITIES:
1. Centers around a Holiday
2. Includes a little boy who's in love, who receives help from an older man.
3. Includes someone who works in the sex industry. (Honestly, I think this is the best acting Anne Hathaway has ever done.)
4. Includes a washed up famous person. (The sports star/the rock star.)
5. Includes a long-term married couple who discovers one of them is/was having an affair.

The list goes on. I'm bored just thinking about this movie.

The Last Airbender


My teenage and pre-teen Sunday School class seemed to unanimously hate this movie.

I loved it.

I thought it was beautiful. I thought it was so refreshing that it wasn't like every other movie out there. The dialog was often lame, and it was by no means perfect. But I wanted to know what happened next. I liked the characters. I wanted to be a fire bender, (except, less evil.) I loved the fighting.

Toy Story 3


History shows us that MOST trilogies follow a pattern: First movie is good, second movie is better, third movie is hard to sit through/not as good as the first two.

Toy Story three follows this pattern. First movie was good, second movie was amazing, third movie was okay, but not as good as the first two.

Other trilogies that follow this pattern include:
Star Wars
X-Men
Spiderman

You get the drill.

Spanish Buzz is hilarious! I want a Buzz Lightyear that has a Spanish flip. I thought Spanish Buzz was played by Antonio Banderas. I was wrong, it's Javier Fernandez Pena.

Side Note: Beware the 4th movie. Rarely is the 4th movie of a trilogy any good at all. (This rule only applies to movies that only have 3 sequels, and does not count for movies where there are 5 or more movies in a set.)

Eclipse


Yes, I saw the midnight premiere. I actually saw the trilogy starting at 6:45, with Eclipse at midnight.

What I didn't understand were the people who got there at the same time as me, waited in line for Eclipse during Twilight and New Moon, and therefor, didn't get the awesome seats those of us that DID see Twilight and New Moon got.

Anyway, this was easily the best of the 3 Twilight movies. I love Bryce Dallas Howard. I hate Dakota Fanning, and most of the Volturi besides the old dude, and the dude who plays Wesley Snipes on 30 Rock.

Despicable Me


Have I mentioned how much I love Steve Carell? More than Carvel ice cream. (Okay, I actually hate Carvel ice cream, but their names are quite similar, don't you think?)

Despicable Me is a "kid movie," but not all kid movies make me want to run away screaming. I loved How to Train Your Dragon, but I love Despicable Me EVEN MORE! It was funny. I was laughing to the point where it was embarrassing.

Screw Toy Story 3. Go see Despicable Me.